It happened. Now that it has passed, any attempt to create a coherent established post or story about the sum of all the crazy is near to impossible. However an attempt must be made!

Tuesday, January 1st: Crunch Time!

As belonging to a group of individuals that represent chaos, any attempt to plan in advanced would have been futile and only end in our ruin. Therefore, we do everything last minute and nothing goes wrong. Well, not as much.

I was planning on having a Juggernaut suit from Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 and my friend Kenny agreed to help since he is incredible with hands-on projects, he even makes his own metal armor! However, due to funding and time dedicated to school, I was not able to help out with the financing and the finding of parts for my outfit until, oh… about less than a week before we go.

Luckily, the hardest part to shape and make (the front chest and neck plates) were already made and I was able to find the rest of the armor from old hockey gear from a Goodwill for a grand total of $5! I nabbed some spray paint and started base coats of black, top coats of olive green, then protective enamel spray. For my first time doing a project such as this, I did not screw it up TOO badly…

Here is a picture of the arm and leg pieces:
Arm and knee plates

I had to make a few supply runs to Walmart because I kept underestimating how many cans of spray paint I need and I ended up finding this bitching plastic rifle there, which led to me to be still spray painting everything until 1:30ish AM on Wednesday morning.

Wednesday, January 2nd: Dawn of the First Day

The day of departure, and the morning was full of hustle and bustle in preparation for the journey. It was on this morning that we found out that our good buddy’s, who was part of our massive group going down to MAGfest, mother passed away the night before. He came down a few days later, and I hope he was in some form of comfort being surrounded by his friends and good times.

Even though MAGfest does not start until Thursday, we go down a day and night early in order to set everything up and just enjoy ourselves. I was driving my own car this year, and it was packed with 4 other people, all our luggage and bags, three different sets of armor, and 4 boxes containing different bottles of booze. Needless to say, there was NO more space in the trunk, and everyone squeezed in for what would be a 2 1/2 hour trip from New Jersey to the Gaylord National Convention Center in Maryland.

The trip down was pretty uneventful, and the excitement began to rebubble once the Gaylord rolled into view as we sliced through this tourist town. After parking and stretching our legs, we decided for a little more exercise and strolled around for some pictures. Here are some shots from outside looking at the magnificent wall of glass that held the atrium (NOTE:My camera phone SUCKS) :
gaylord1gaylord2gaylord3gaylord4
After having enough of the cold, we stopped inside the atrium and hopped up to the bar:
atr1atr2atr3atrbar

While waiting for our room to be ready a few of us had a victory beer for our successful return:
victory

The urge having to move striking once again, I decided to ride the elevators to random floors to explore (Floor 17 had a lot of wine glasses out in the hallways. Those poor classy bastards had no idea what was about to happen to them that week):
atr4atr5hall1hall2gaylord5gaylord6gaylord7gaylord8natharboratr6atr7behindhewhowalksgaylord9gaylord10gaylord11
Finally, I got the call: the room was ready. Turns out, when I got to our floor, I took the wrong elevator and ended up walking FOREVER to get to the room. After that, I memorized which elevators would take us practically to our room.

Oh, did I mention we had gotten a Suite? For something like 30+ of my friends? Living room, dining room, coat room, kitchen, 2 sleeping rooms with total of 3 beds, 3 bathrooms, and 5 balconies overlooking the atrium. Welcome to the Baller’s Ball.
fridge/dishwasherkitchenDining room w tableLiving Room w Lounge ChairsA balconyGearing up
Here are some of the views from the balconies (I do not tend to stay out on them long, I get queasy and have irrational fears of people falling off of them):
atr8atr9atr10
Satisfying my immediate visual surrounding, it was now customary to take the First Shit of the vacation. You know you are staying in swank when they even have the toilet paper decorated for you:
100% ClassBest shower EVER
Some of the sleep rooms:
room10room11
Keep in mind, this is the room fresh and undefiled.

Now, when the sun goes down and darkness arises, the atrium lights up with incredible violets, reds, greens, and blues and the fountain does a spurting dance to a song and light show every night. It is absolutely gorgeous:
atr11atr12atr13atr14
Now that most of us were unpacked and settled in, we decided to get in the mood by breaking in the poker chips and cards that the suite came with and to stock up the bar in the kitchen and get some drinks in us. Turns out, those thin chips made great Tiddleywinks!
Tiddleywinks!Our bar
Now that there was some buzz going, it was time to leave the room and go ‘sploring some more!
atr15To the smoking areaCheckered hallway to ColorlandIan riding the EscalatorsSmoking area/pool buildinglooking up from the smoking area
Time to head back for some more dranks!
BarChillinRoom of mirrorsMike Wus: Best bartenderchilln out relxaing all cool
From there on, there was some blackjack mixed in there, more people from our group arrived, more drinks flowed, fights happened, wandering commenced, and all in all it was a bloody good time.

Some left over photos that happened later in the night:
atr16Smoke break outsideHeterosexual lifemateThe actual entranceParking lotpawking lotsneighboring buildingnatharbor5natharbor6natharbor7

Thursday, January 3rd: It Begins

My. Fucking. Head. OW. Ok, Mike Wus can make some seriously fantastic drinks. However, I was having such a good time, I forgot to drink water. FAAAAAWWK, THE PAIN!

I have lost my jacket and keys. Panic begins to settle in. Every year, MAGfest takes something from us as a sacrifice, or perhaps punishment for no tribute. The first year I went, my brand new camera I got for Christmas that year fucking vanished. This year, the sacrifice seemed to have came early, how could have this have happened? We had some stranger that we met in our room, did perhaps on of them lifted it while we were passing out? The search begins in heavy fog. My keys were hooked on my pants, but now there were not. Did I leave them in my coat?

Determined not to let this ruin my entire vacation, I stop repeatedly looking around in circles and go downstairs. The convention has started (We all slept well past the opening ceremonies. Please, MAGfest starts when WE arrive, not when they say so) so the Gaylord is slowly filling up with people, nerds, and RAAAAAAAOUGH Colossus roars (fucking HATE that noise. Especially with a hangover).

Eventually I tire, and head back to the room. I am greeted by an amusing sight: using a tank of party helium, it was discovered that it included no balloons. So others went out and bought out all of the Lifestyle condoms at the local CVS and substituted them in instead. A few had lotion in them (one of these exploded, releasing fake spunk everywhere), and others were filled with different objects that included a plastic spoon, Pops cereal, and another slightly blown up condom in another condom (Contra-ception). Some of these balloons were tied outside onto our balcony railing:
Fill er up!They started to try to run awayWhich one is our room?You know where the party is
Hehehe: throughout the day and night, Mike Wus bought a bucket off of a bartender who gave him a receipt and told him he could do whatever he would like with it, so he stocked it with beer and ice, tied some condom-balloons to it, and waltzed outside for smoke breaks and to share drinks with others and meet friends. At one point, a little girl (its was a convention center so there were a few Normies around) point at us and exclaimed: “Look, he has bawloons!” Fucking priceless.

At this point I am going to finish the rest of the trip and pictures tomorrow, giving me time to readjust my sleeping schedule and recover my thoughts.